305.

so i went to my first heat game this past weekend. heat vs hawks - playoff game 3. nice! the seats were great(on top of the arena - but great), the company was great, the game was great. everything was great until the 2nd quarter when pitbull's mini me showed up and sat in the seat right next to me. where is the hand sanitizer when you need it??

this guy was wearing a white heat jersey (side note: i'm sorry boys, basketball jerseys on non basketball players are just plain unattractive) - umm, newsflash buddy, the miami heat asked for all fans to wear black and even went so far as to hand out free shirts when you got there. dipshit.

he was also wearing sunglasses. on his face. during the entire game. this is not street ball. there is no glare reflecting off the blacktop. we are indoors. someone please tell me who decided this was cool. everyone knows that you make fun of people who wear their sunglasses indoors or at night. so why would you wear them to a freaking indoor basketball game that also happens to be at night?? retard.

and although he did start the evening next to me, he continued to move to any empty seat he could find and start talking to whoever was next to him. god help the group of asians he was with during the 4th quarter. when this seat hopping charade began - a woman next to me asked him where his seat was... to which he replied "oh yeah, you know i'm right behind the heat bench yo. yo yo yo blah blah blah i have no class..." you expect me to believe you pretty much had court side seats and now you are in row 900? riiight...

and he was covered in tattoos. hey if that's your thing - to each his own. but having an area code (among other things) inked onto your arm? why, in case you forget and need to phone home? how lame are you? please note the aforementioned tattoo on his right arm. gay.

i just wanted to pull him aside and clue him in on how big of a douche he appeared to be. you are spilling beer on people and screaming louder than the 6 year olds behind me who are hopped up on cotton candy and soda. and stop yelling "did you see that?!" in people's faces. what in the hell do you think i came here for? to eat ice cream and talk about gossip girl? maybe a game of scrabble? idiot. of course i saw that you dumbass - i'm at a basketball game. but who knows, maybe on any other day he is actually somewhat intelligent and charming. haha. no.

if this guy had any chance of having an education i could only guess that he went to miami dade community college. or university of miami if i'm going to be generous. (can't spell dump/scum without um!)

and for christ's sake, get a razor. you are not hugh jackman, colin farrell, or paul walker. you cannot pull off the sexy scruffy look.

seriously, i wonder how many diseases this kid has.


btw - the heat won. 107 - 78.